Whenever it seems like I’m getting ahead in my work, I remember that the blog hasn’t been updated, and then my Inadequacy Meter does something like a red line rev, the mercury shoots through the crack in the casing, and I feel the cold dread that you get whenever you handle liquid metal without protection. Or that might just be disappointment. So I scramble to come up with something that’s mildly witty and interesting, though it comes across as barely functional English narrative neither noteworthy or particularly insightful in form or fashion.
But at least I fill the page up, right? I don’t know why I keep forgetting it’s not the concessions that bring people to sports arenas. Why do I persist in serving cotton candy and wimpy beer on my blog? These are mysteries to be contemplated, best by philosophers of the future who read and suddenly, the questions of why civilization failed will not seem so unanswerable. There are clues, scattered about on every blog.
My continuing adventures in the Northern California region, which, seems like it’s the freak cousin of Southern California–the relative that everyone sort of acknowledges in half-tone whispers of regret and embarrassment. If only Oregon and Mexico hadn’t slept together. Northern California seems to lack the settled and laidback surfer sense of Southern California, and it overcompensates by trying too hard to be cultured in a sophisticated, we-make-and-sell-wine-what-do-you-do sort of manner. To a southern California resident, it comes across like the professor who wears the big bow tie and tries to fit in at frat parties. Dude, we may be stoned, but we’re not fooled by the rocks you got. C’mon!
Saturday night we grilled hamburgers and cooked silver corn and onions and peppers and then reclined en masse in front of the god-like twelve foot rectangular projection screen to watch Bad Boys…in HD…so it was like I’d never seen it before! Picture so clear you can see Martin Lawrence’s future arrest record in full-on Michael “Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder” Bay mode.
Sleeping in was great. Waking up at eight. Not so much. But lately, that is sleeping in, so it averages out, and since I opted out of the morning church service, I got to take in a leisurely morning of chatting with Emily and reading. The churchgoers returned and we all spent the rest of the morning eating cinnamon buns and talking about theology, including the history of the popes. We’re a wild bunch, we are.
Based on an evangelical acquaintance’s recommendation, we pile into the car and drive to Vacaville, which is home to a jazz fest and wine tasting. We arrive, only to find that the word jazz had been replaced by fey-southern rock and wine referred to lemonade. Derek and I found ourselves walking around town looking for an ATM, which, we were assured before leaving, there would be in abundance, since the fest was sponsored by a bank. Though if I had been more lucid, I might have questioned whether ATMs would be wheeled out en masse for the gathering to stave off any possible lack of cash flow.
After some debate, we decided we were having more fun insulting the town than enjoying the lamentable festivities, and so made our way to Suisan, which is not the town where Bruce Lee grew up. I knew what you all were thinking. We dined for late lunch at the Athenian, a Greek bistro on the water, where we repasted and discussed the shallowness of today’s culture (Entry–See: blogs, fringe) and whether one of us could get away with murder. As I said before, we’re a wild bunch.
After the delicious (and cheap!) food, Mike and I grabbed ice cream and we wandered along the canal, observing the two hobo-like men who were attempting to bring a stranded RC boat back into dock using a fishing line. (They were unsuccessful over a forty minute period, and at the time of our departure, had failed to retrieve the craft.) Tanika and I created a plot for a novel which may in fact be the single greatest political thriller of all time. I now have a Nanowrimo project. We headed back in the westering sun, said our goodbyes, and made our way back to Los Angeles.
Was it good for you? Leave comments as appropriate.