In the spirit of inciting a further increase in the gender gap (thanks to Lauren for showing the way), I’ve decided to write some additional points for “He’s Just Not That Into You”, which I don’t claim to have read, and probably wouldn’t even if given the chance. Note, these are more counter to the purpose of the list which Lauren has listed, but that’s because I love bucking the quo.
These are a big clue to why I’m still single (the other is I haven’t tried not to be single–it’s just such a sweet life…)
#21: “You’re actually kind of a floozy when you drink too much, which turns some well-meaning guys off.”
#35: “There’s not much a guy can do if a girl likes him and he doesn’t reciprocate. He’s going to enjoy LBTH (Life Before The Hounding).”
#50: “You’re an amazing person of deep inner beauty, a quiet wit, and above average intelligence. Dolphins will always appreciate your talents.”
#68: “If you’re going to eat that farking Triple Chocolate Bypass Cheesecake by Godiva (AKA Satan’s Minions) and then complain that you feel fat to your boyfriend, I hope he leaves you for a skinny supermodel, because you deserve it.”
#89: “You deserve a phone call. Here, I’ve signed you up with one of those automated online services.”
#103: “I will continue using every guy who likes me to get things I want.”
#133: “You’re cool and all, but you didn’t notice my new haircut. WTF?!”
#151: “I’ve made bad choices in the past picking guys who weren’t good for me. I’m going to continue to make bad choices, because I’m just that way. I guess that’s life. I’ll just have to deal.”
#183: “Oh. My. God. These pants make me look hideous.”
#214: “You can like someone without loving them. The reverse is also true. Stop getting them mixed up.”
#226: “Telling your ex that God told you to break things off is a straight up bitchy thing to do.”
#260: “I will take everything he says and construe it to mean something entirely different. Then I will start a fight with him because what he says is so mean.”
#287: “He doesn’t hate you. He just doesn’t want to date you.”
And so on…I’m really quite nice in real life.
Also related, an explanation for why people are having less sex (via Instapundit).